miss_newham

Edit: My phone has been resuscitated. It still probably needs replacing soon, but it's nice that I can have a chance at making sure the stuff that should get backed up is actually backed up, etc. There is a plan for this to happen, but I am so relieved that it isn't urgent.

So here is my account of the annoying 24 hours I just had.

stuff to read before bed
audiobooks/podcasts to fall asleep to/keep me company when I wake up in the middle of the night
the weather app
checking how badly the Twins lost last night
going to the gym (needs an app) (not that I've had time to go to the gym yet, but knowing that I couldn't -- without trying to get the silent young people behind the desk to help me anyway -- still made me sad)
reading my DW circle! it's so busy lately with 3weeks4dreamwidth hooray, but I feel so out of touch!
podcasts to keep me company while I brush my teeth, empty the dishwasher, make tea
very easy game to play as a like a fidget toy
messaging the group chat that provides most of my social life these days
checking my e-mail
looking up a thing
taking a picture of a silly thing for social media
social media
looking up another thing
podcasts to keep me company
messaging the people in my house about tea etc.
telling the time
reading that tab I had open
adding something to the shopping list
planning when to leave the house to get the bus to transgym
checking I had booked for transgym
writing an e-mail
social media
texting the neighbor about walking Teddy
podcasts
reading my library (audio)book, via the Libby app
calling the doctor to make an appointment
trying the terrible NHS App to see if I can get an appointment (it's not urgent I just keep forgetting to make it)
two-factor authentication (luckily I could opt for an e-mail to be sent to me instead)
using the camera to zoom in on stuff that I can't see properly (like what signs say)

I'm so tired.

lathany

On Friday, Ryan and I boarded a train and headed off to Lewes for the weekend. We were very lucky with the weather.

Saturday, we were tourists. It started foggy, but soon cleared up.

cosmolinguist

Colorful image that says 3weeks4dreamwidth friending meme

(Also, mostly-unrelatedly, I learned today that at some previous point my decades-old carefully curated interests on my profile page, more than a hundred of them, had been accidentally deleted in a Bad UI Incident, leaving only a handful that I was *trying to delete*. So I've deleted them all now. Maybe I'll put some back, eventually...)

cosmolinguist

The liberal actor is anonymous, they are not discussed in the law. They are not legislated about. That subject is typically cisgender, heterosexual, abled, socio-economically stable, and male. All other subjects are rendered visible through the law...

My disability is neither negative nor positive; however, it demands that I be aware of my own vulnerability. Being disabled brings me great comfort. I am not the liberal political actor. I am dependent upon others, and this dependency has made my body visible within the law...

If we make our differences invisible, that erases the ways in which my disability, as well as my other identities, shape my life and experience both positively and negatively. For this reason, I argue that the law is not liberatory and can never be so. What is liberatory is other people.

From an internet pal of mine, Riley Valentine. Who's currently got a call for chapters out for a book on disability and authoritarianism, which I'm glad to see.

cosmolinguist

Perfect weather! Mid-70s(F), and I still can't get over how it's not humid and there's no bugs to bother us outside here in the spring/summer.

D and I spent the day in the best way possible: going for a gentle walk around with some people he knows from the internet and two Good Dogs (Toby and Biscuit), followed by a pub lunch.

Then, after a short rest to recharge D and his phone, we went into town for more day-drinking to celebrate a friend's birthday. We got home about 9pm which felt so late but still left me with time and energy to change my bedding (I don't know about D but I was sweating last night), have a shower (so much more sweat in the walk this morning, in the direct sunlight of a cloudless beautiful sky), and dig out the fan from where it's stored over the winter to where it lives in my room when I need it. I worried it'd be a bit unnecessary yet but the fan is fancy and has a temperature indicator on it which said it's 20 (C) in here; yeah that's too hot for comfy sleeping.

cosmolinguist

After I finally finished work (our theory-of-change meetings are getting existential, this one gave me such a headache), I went outside to sit outside in perfect weather, barefoot, listening to the radio, reading my library book, and enjoying the smell of the neighbors' lilacs.

Then I made an easy dinner, and then D and I cycled to a nearby pub for a pint. A big trip for him! It's lovely that he's feeling up to doing stuff now that the weather is making it so much more fun to do things.

cosmolinguist

After my alarm went off this morning I was lying in bed for a few minutes, listening to the sounds come in through the open windows. I heard a truck on the nearby big road, a train zoom past on the railroad tracks, a plane overhead, sirens doppeling down the road.

Felt like I was living in Busytown for a second there!

A friend told me that Pauline Oliveros wrote some meditations for listening, apparently she called it Deep Listening. He said hearing things through a window like that is a great and grounded way to start the day.

cosmolinguist

Welp, the appointment didn't happen!

D and I clicked the link for the video consult and signed in and everything and then nothing happened!

D tried to call them, got an automatic message that said we'd called outside their operating hours or whatever, but then said they were open until 5pm on Wednesdays and it was just past 3pm. Very strange.

So he sent an e-mail but of course we've heard nothing back; I didn't expect we would until tomorrow.

It made for a strange afternoon, having to go back to work. I wasn't up to doing any thinky work but I had admin work to do so it was good to catch up on that.

Then I took Teddy for a walk, he was so excited to see me after a couple days where I couldn't make it or I was not needed. It's chilly out because it's so windy, but it was a sunny day and the sky was wonderfully blue.

I wanted to make dinner but V suggested putting a frozen meal from the freezer in the oven and we did that. Thai green curry, so I made rice to go with it. Even though I wasn't hungry, I ate mine pretty quickly.

I listened to a podcast interview with Dick Bremer, and had a bunch of feelings because it was the first time I'd heard his voice since he called whichever was the last regular-season game I watched in 2023.

D had gotten me a present, intending to be a "well done for getting through the thing" but it arrived this evening even after the thing had not happened. I opened it anyway: it's an amazing bottle of gin called Moonshot because each batch of Moonshot Gin likely has some molecules in it that came in contact with a rock that was once actually on the moon. The botanicals in this gin were freeze-dried by being sent towards space -- not really "space" because the Kármán line is a further 80 km up. There they were "exposed to extremely low pressures" the label copy says, adding one of the sillier phrases I've read off a bottle: "(after 18 or 19km the pressure is already so low that water and fluids in the body boil at body temperature!)"

Luckily the gin also tastes nice. It's a gimmick but it's worked extremely well on me, and it's lovely to feel so looked-after as to get a surprise present in acknowledgement of a big thing.

Even if we're no closer to the big thing than we were before.

mark posting in

dw_maintenance

Happy Wednesday!

I'm taking search offline sometime today to upgrade the server to a new instance type. It should be down for a day or so -- sorry for the inconvenience. If you're curious, the existing search machine is over 10 years old and was starting to accumulate a decade of cruft...!

Also, apparently these older machines cost more than twice what the newer ones cost, on top of being slower. Trying to save a bit of maintenance and cost, and hopefully a Wednesday is okay!

Edited: The other cool thing is that this also means that the search index will be effectively realtime afterwards... no more waiting a few minutes for the indexer to catch new content.

cosmolinguist

Yesterday ended up so unexpectedly nice, I wanted to record it.

D messaged me mid-afternoon to say that circuits was happening again that evening. I used to love transgym circuits, I did that as well as lift club almost every week and I've never been happier. But then our usual awesome trainer stopped doing circuits, which is fair enough but I was/am so used to their style and so comfy with it, and then the replacement started doing more of a boxing style fitness class, which was not to my taste (or accessibility needs: my lack of depth perception was posing too much of a problem) and then I kept being busy on those nights or whatever and I just stopped going some time last fall I think.

But I've really missed circuits; I love circuits. It feels like such a good workout for me: I can do even exercises I hate for a minute or two at a time, I never get bored, and I feel at the end like I've really Done Something. I used to have to bring bandanas to tie around my head to keep from getting too much sweat in my eyes, and I forgot to do that last night and really missed it! Because it's hard work.

And most of the people there weren't our usual old circuits people but people I knew from lift club who hadn't been to circuits before (or, did it like once a very long time ago or whatever). Including one of my favorites, who I said I'd meet outside and go in with together. I was really excited for him because I thought he'd love circuits and he did.

And, when I suddenly found myself with plans to be out for the evening I thought I'd start dinner prep right after work -- i did this last Friday when I went to yoga. But as I was still peeling sweet potatoes, D came downstairs, having finished work earlier than usual, and offering to help. So we just made all of my very easy plan for dinner (bangers and mash) and I had plenty of time to eat before going to the gym. It was lovely to spend the time together, it made an easy thing easier but also just so much more fun: being silly together in the nice sunny kitchen (I'm still not used to it being that bright at dinner time! it wasn't totally dark when I was getting showered after the gym, at about 9pm! bliss).

And I'm very glad I was able to eat beforehand: even with V warning me as I left the house "take it easy! you're out of practice!", even though I did take it easy, I was so sore by the time I got home. I knew not to sit down before I got upstairs and in the shower because I'd never stand up again. But I was so happy, too -- and it wasn't just the endorphins making me think that.

cosmolinguist

Tomorrow, I'm having an initial video consultation with a clinic that doesn't rule people out because of BMI.

I really didn't want to have to travel for surgery (it makes what's already an indescribably big deal so much bigger), but it's looking like this is my only option.

squirmelia

-- --- --- --
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A listing of the number of carriages on each form of public transport I took for two weeks. One dash is one carriage. I also included buses and used one dash for a single decker, two dashes for a double decker. Most days are quite symmetrical, but not all.

squirmelia

I watch the ripples in the river from Blackfriars Station, and the sun is shining, but looking at the foreshore - the heaps of pebbles and bits of wood sticking out and the rocky patches, I feel incredibly sad.

I had a good year, finding treasure, all of it treasure, on the Thames foreshore. In reality I found pottery sherds and bits of glass and all kinds of discarded things, but it seemed like they were the most amazing things I'd ever seen, as they were from the river.

I learnt so much, about everything from Bovril jars to uranium glass to vulcanite bottle stoppers to milk trains to hat polish to aerated bread to bearded men to bullets to knucklebones to eels to fossils to ink. I also learnt a lot more about Londoners of the past, about what people drank (ginger beer and R White’s) and ate (marmalade) and smoked (clay pipes). But also about cafes and pubs that once existed and shops and societies, and also who made the items I found, the factories and the kilns and the bottle makers, and the streets that are no longer there. I saw a different side of London, a side of London directly entwined with the past.

I walked along the foreshore in many different parts of London, from Kew to Putney to Chelsea to Battersea to Vauxhall to the Southbank to Wapping to Rotherhithe to Limehouse to Greenwich to Surrey Quays to the Isle of Dogs, and at different times of day, at sunrise and sunset, early in the morning, sometimes even at night when it was dark and I'd take a torch. I saw London from a different angle, watching commuters walk by above me, oblivious. I hadn't explored the foreshore much before and walking along there, across the pebbles, the sand, the mud, with the river beside me was a delight.

Mudlarking became such an important part of my life. I consulted tide times and organised things around them, I carried wellies around with me and rubber gloves.

Mudlarking gave me a reason to want to get back to London when I'd been away and made London feel like it was my home and the place I really wanted to be.

I am sad that now my permit has expired I can’t go mudlarking anymore. The river and the foreshore will still be there for me though, and London, of course, will still be there, and I learnt to love it even more through mudlarking. In a few years, perhaps I'll get another chance.

squirmelia

Low tide was conveniently just after work so for my last mudlark, I headed to Ernie’s Beach and walked along to the spot outside the National Theatre and to Waterloo Bridge. I've found so much here.

There was one other mudlark there and they said hello to me as I walked past, feeling grumpy. The tide was quite high for a low tide again and I just picked up anything really, sad and desperate, as it was my last time.

A last piece of Willow and a last piece of ABC and a last piece of Express Dairies Aster pattern.

There is a sherd that looks like it could have said Rutland. But what else did it say? Rutland Arms Hotel, J&B G.., London?

The sherd with Burslem on it is from Newport Potteries who were in operation from 1920.

The brown piece is likely to be from a stoneware R White’s bottle.

There's a mysterious number on one piece.

I also found a broken button.

My favourite find on this day was the glass bottle stopper.

(You need a permit to search or mudlark on the Thames foreshore.)

cosmolinguist

Since the day that I had no brain juice, I feel like I've been improving slowly, but from a low bar.

I had to miss a social thing that D's girlfriend organized on Thursday night, and I didn't go to D&D (also at her house) this afternoon because I've had a stabby bad-nystagmus-day headache on and off all afternoon and didn't think anything so visuals-intensive would be good for me. Between this and no lift club yesterday, I've been feeling in need of more socializing. And I feel like I didn't make much of my weekend, last night aside.

Last night was amazing though. After a little bit of annoyance at the insufficiency of the transport information given between the Britain First rally (ugh) that afternoon and preparations for the marathon today, both of which were between my house and the Bridgewater Hall, I determined the train would be best and -- with a little bit of running at the last minute -- it went smoothly. Like I said, it was angelofthenorth's first visit to the Bridgewater Hall, and I was glad that she liked it as much as I hoped she would -- she already wants to go back in the next few days.

We had surprisingly great seats, considering that when I called up to get tickets and was asked where I want to sit, I said I didn;'t care and I just didn't want to pay a lot. I don't think I'd heard Duke Ellington's Harlem before, but just like all the Duke Ellington I had heard it was a delight -- highlights were watching the conductor Joshua Weilerstein bouncing and flailing around, almost as if he was dancing to the music himself. Miriam exclaimed to me afterwards about the harp matching the double-basses.

The second piece, Nikolai Kapustin's Piano Concerto No. 4 was introduced to us as "wacky jazz but with rock, soul and maybe even funk hiding behind the very bland name. From where we were sitting, I could admire the pano soloist Frank Dupree in his forest-green suit who always had his hans flying around the piano keyboard, but next to his grand piano was a drummer at a trap set who was arguably a second soloist for the piece. It was really extraordinary, a ton of fun. When they finished, the pianist said "Would you like to hear some more?" (much to the surprise of the conductor, M later told me! she did the best audio description) and the well-mannered audience cheered enthusiastically enough that he seemed genuinely surprised in his reply, "Wow!"

For this obviously the orchestra wasn't involved, just him and his drummer pal whose name I didn't catch. The other musicians on stage watched along with the rest of the audience as these two played Kapustin's Concert etude No. 1. It had a drum solo! During which Dupree "snuck" away from his piano to come up behind the drum kit, theatrically grab a couple of drum sticks, and play right along with the drummer in a call-and-response way that deserved the chuckles it got (including what sounded like some use of the music stands etc.), with him getting back to his piano stool and send his fingers flying across the keys.

And then after the interval the main event, Antonín Dvořák's Symphony No. 9 in E minor, ‘From the New World’ which the intro said some of those players might have played 100 times, or 50 times. He described it as helping them pay their mortgages. The audience was asked how many had seen it performed before, how many had listened to it... M was expecting us to be asked how many of us had played it, to which of course I'd have been so excited to raise my hand. I hadn't listened to it in about 20 years, but I knew almost all of the symphony, and when we got to my beloved last movement, I couldn't sit still in my seat. I played bassoon for that in a band that didn't have strings, so I heard familiar parts not just in the bassoon but cello and double bass. Neurons that haven't gotten to light up for 25 years got to glow.

We joined the crowds decanting ourselves into the shiny darkness and on to Oxford Road station, with about ten minutes before our train home. I was still so excited I couldn't sit down while we waited.

So I wish I'd made more of my weekend to fend off burnout and some challenging things ahead of me this week, but last night was better than I had any expectation it would be.

squirmelia

Beaumont Stairs in Chelsea have been my go to place when I want somewhere quiet, where I'm definitely not going to be bothered by tourists, and there probably won't be any other mudlarks.

I saw the remains of trees that once grew here and it amazes me that they are still here. The bus stop was also still on the foreshore. I thought once it was gone, but no.

After the tide had turned, I walked along, wondering if I could find the Saxon fish trap. I had seen a picture of it near some boats. I couldn't see any way down to the foreshore near the boats though. I think the tide was just too high on this day to see it. I walked on and found myself in Cremorne Gardens which used to be pleasure gardens from 1845 to 1877. They have saved the grand gate and it's in the little park there still. There used to be all kinds of entertainment there - from tight-rope walkers across the Thames, to hot air balloon rides, fireworks, dances, a marionette theatre, and so on.

Further on and I could see a mudlark on the foreshore but I couldn't work out where steps were to get there. There looked like there was a range of stuff down there.

Finds:
A piece of an Express Dairies milk bottle
A piece of a bottle that says Wells on it

Two patterned pipe stems - one looks to say “d market” on it and “nny” on the other side.

An original vulcanite bottle stopper from Barrett & Elers.

Part of a Hartley’s jam jar

A few pieces of mocha ware

A nice piece of Staffordshire style combed slipware

A chunky glass stem. I have another of these and liked to imagine it might once have been part of a penny lick.

A Bourne & Son stoneware base
A Doulton Lambeth stoneware base

A saucer shaped like a teapot, which I think is modern

A plate with a diamond mark - this shows the plate was made on 6th April 1868.

A toothbrush, missing the handle, made of bone.

Keys, attached to a Lego keyring.

(You need a permit to search or mudlark on the Thames foreshore.)

cosmolinguist

My parents want to talk to me today instead of tomorrow, because tomorrow they're going to be out at something that they don't want to do (I think this is hilarious; they're going to watch my cousin in some kind of ice-skating event; Mom has been complaining about this for weeks, they even have to pay for it, they really don't want to go, and yet at no point have they just told my dad's brother/sister-in-law "No thanks"!).

But tonight, angelofthenorth and will be out seeing one of my favorite symphonies (we played the Finale in high school, I bought a cheapo CD of this and something else from Dvorak afterwards because listening to stuff I used to know that intimately is always fun...and M hasn't been to the Bridgewater Hall yet so I'm looking forward to seeing what she thinks of it).

So I told my parents about half an hour ago that I'm around if they want to talk, and the one downside of modern video meeting platforms (that works on both Linux and an iPad operated by people who don't know, for example, the difference between text messages and e-mails; we use Jitsi) is that I can't just wait to hear if they call so I'm tethered to my laptop for the next little while still, to see if my mom appears with her usual greeting "Do we have you?"

Edit: I never did hear from my parents, even though I hung around long enough to put off changing clothes and getting ready to go until after angelofthenorth got here. I got the exact same "We are home to talk" e-mail at 8.30 like usual. And of course I've done that "sending an e-mail before I check my e-mail" thing, but even after this there was no acknowledgement of my message or, y'know, my reality at all. Like V said when I caught them up on this news, it just shows how much this is not about me.

cosmolinguist

We have a spice mix grinder, with lemon and garlic and chili and sea salt in it. It's so good.

But when I tried to add some to our dinner tonight, I noticed it wasn't really working. Despite it being single-use plastic, I managed to take apart the grinding bits, and when I couldn't scrape away the gunk I just left them in some water to soak.

I was just thinking I haven't done anything today, but I've done that. Tiny little thing that should make the future nicer. And more flavorful.

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miss_newham

January 2025

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Reading

Things I have missed since my phone died last night

Lewes

3 Weeks 4 Dreamwidth friending meme

Keeping this because I think it'll be useful for work

Sun and socializing

I love lilacs

Transport sounds

Gintervention

Search maintenance

a happy Monday

All I want to say about this

Public transport dashes

Mudlarking

Mudlarking 106 - The last mudlark

Great Bridgewater Night

Mudlarking 104 - Farewell to Beaumont Stairs

Waiting for the mom

The spice of life

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January 2025

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